February 6, 2018
It’s Feb 6, and we are well into the month that celebrates LOVE! While I’m not typically one to go all out on Valentine’s Day and indulge in it’s commercialization, I do like to do a little something special for my love ❤ . What I want to talk about is the passion surrounding this holiday and use it as a reminder that we are LOVE and we should express and share the love within us. There’s a reason RED is the color of the month – it’s fiery, daring and a little dangerous! When it comes to romantic love, do you and your partner need to reignite the spark you once had? Recreate that lovin’ feeling? It’s very easy when you’ve been in a long-term relationship or have been married for several years that your partner suddenly feels like a roommate instead of that hot thing you were crazy 😝 about. Life – job stress, kids, that to-do list – can fill your day, day in and day out, so much that days and weeks have gone by before you were intimate with your mate. You take each other for granted. I’ve been there, and I’m sure you have, too!
We women have GOT to find ways to get our “sexy” back, borrowing JT’s song title here, revitalize your relationships as Women’s Health says. Some great steps to take are to take some time away from each other. Give your relationship a breather. You each have to have your own hobbies, friends and lives to enjoy and allow yourself your space so that you find your significant other sexy and new again. Being away from each other cultivates longing and gives your relationship air to breathe. Take a fun weekend trip away with the girls and just see how it creates that new energy toward your husband!
Secondly, “re-sexualize” yourself. Kaitlin Menza in her article in this month’s WH magazine, says to keep doing the things you used to do to reawaken your sexuality – go get your hair done, take a dance class, wear that red lipstick 💄, get a massage (my go to!), buy new lingerie or a sex toy. The sex toy industry has exploded in recent years for female-centric toys. Indulge! Give yourself time to relax into that sexual feeling – mind, body and spirit. Often times, we simply need to slow down and calm down our “monkey minds” through stillness and meditation to get us there. Intentional breathing exercises and connecting with your breath with slower, longer inhales and exhales are a quick way to become more relaxed.
Third, get physical outside the bedroom, meaning turn those casual touches like the five second shoulder rub into something more to create arousal. Being more affectionate and sensual cultivate a newly charged energy between you. Be creative and spontaneous and surprise him once in a while! He won’t forget it…;) Lastly, I say talk about sex with your partner. Communication is everything. You each need to feel comfortable expressing your desires and what you need and so does he. Maybe you need longer foreplay. He won’t know unless you let him know – and let him know in a nice way. 😉 Your relationship, overall, will be sexier and stronger with being able to express what you need to increase this intimacy. Most couples don’t talk about sex which can cause loneliness leading one or both to find that closeness elsewhere. Such relationships suffer as a result, possibly ending in divorce. This dialogue is important, so you be the ball and start it!
Let this month be your motivation to create that SPARK! Be RED! Be LOVE!
Tell me what you do to get YOUR sexy on! How do you cultivate romantic love? Let’s start the convo… Leave me a comment!
Right on!
Totally agree! Whenever I get a new man in my life, I look forward to being creative to keep the fire 🔥 burning red hot !
The blog is interesting and so true. When my husband & I haven’t been physical for too long, it shows in our relationship, we get sort of distant. When we have a regular love-life, we seem to talk more about our hopes, dreams and fears. When we keep close physically, we also keep close emotionally.
Yes, Pati, I, and I’m guessing, MANY go thru this kind of cycle. I think it generally goes back to the fact that men need sex to feel emotionally connected, and we women need the emotional connection before we want sexual intimacy. It’s a hard dynamic. Both parties need to fulfill the each others’ needs to be able to connect and enjoy that sexual intimacy that brings SO MANY wonderful benefits – health benefits like increase in oxytocin, better sleep, less stress, etc. I’m encouraging women to nourish the LOVE within ourselves first so that we are able to give to our partners. Thank you for your comment, everyone! I think this convo is important and needs to happen…